The Murderous Queen's Club
by lotrfan1
Summary: The story isn't gruesome like the title. Queens Galadriel and Arwen don't like living with their husbands anymore. So, with the help of Legolas and a new character, they solve their problems. A bit of Mary Sue, but of well. Please R/R!
1. Arwen's Story

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. Nothing! *breaks out in tears* Why can't Legolas be mine? 

Chapter 1- Arwen's story.

Arwen was sick and tired of Aragorn making all the decisions for Gondor. She wanted to make some, too. After all, she was Queen. Arwen didn't really love Aragorn anymore. After they had gotten married, he had turned into a fat, selfish pig. Arwen had given Aragorn her immortality because she wanted to spend one life with him. The thought of living all the lifetimes of the world would have crushed. She thought of that fateful day. What was she thinking!!! She wanted her immortality back from Aragorn. The thought of living one life with HIM and then dying didn't sound so appealing to her anymore.

Her immortality was in a necklace called The Evenstar. It didn't make men immortal; they just lived a longer life. It wouldn't hurt him if she took it back. But men are so greedy. Aragorn would never give her back the necklace. He had protested when she had given it to him. She switched them while he was sleeping. Now that was done. 

A couple days after the switch, she asked for a divorce. Aragorn said no and stomped off. So she had another plan to make. How to get rid of Aragorn without making it look like she did it.

Since Aragorn would not divorce her, she suggested that they go to couples counseling. The counselor said that they should try harder to respect the cultures of each other's race. He also said that they should try to live as the other would.

Arwen had no intention of becoming like a man. So, she decided for the both of them that he would be like an elf. You see, this was part of the plan. He was to be fed grains and nuts. Arwen would poison the food and he would die a slow painful death.

This would take weeks. After Aragorn died, Arwen became queen. She ruled Gondor for a couple of months. She then got lonely. She wanted a new man, but she wanted him to not rule. She found the perfect person. Legolas Greenleaf. He was supposed to go to the Undying Lands with Gimli. He had decided he really didn't like Gimli anymore. He had told him to go on the boat with Frodo and Bilbo. He had told Gimli that he had an errand to do with Galadriel, who also wanted to stay back, and he would be there in a couple of days. Once you are in the Undying Lands, you could never come back. 

But Legolas was a prince. He would become King of Gondor, which is not what she wanted. They decided they needed to kill Thranduil, Legolas's father. But how??? 


	2. Galadriel's Story

Disclaimer: I don't own anything. What do you want from me????

Chapter 2-Galadriel's Story

We will get back to Arwen's and Legolas's problem in the next chapter. This is Galadriel's story.

Galadriel didn't want Celeborn ruling Lorien while she was away at The Gray Havens. So she decided she wanted to stay behind. Legolas also wanted to stay back so she said he was going to run an errand for her and they would take the next boat out to the Undying Lands. 

The whole world except Galadriel was shocked at Aragorn's death. She knew Arwen wouldn't like him. She decided to follow her granddaughter's footsteps. She really didn't like Celeborn that much anymore. After more than 3,000 years of marriage it was time to call it quits. She wasn't going to ask for a divorce because if he said yes, she would not be Queen anymore. 

Since Galadriel lives in a tree, she pushed him off the edge. She made it look like he was committing suicide. She also got very lonely. She had seen the movie Harry Potter. Oliver Wood was very cute. Since Middle-Earth is before 20th century London, she had only seen the first movie. Oliver Wood was now about 21 and he was playing Qudditch for the Irish team. In the first movie Fred or George, she couldn't tell which, said that people disappear during Qudditch games. She decided that he would be one of those people, he would just never come back. 

She used her mirror to see were he was. Legolas actually did the errand that he told everyone he was doing. Since he was a younger elf, he had to do the magic to bring him to Middle-Earth. The whole process was very draining, and the younger you were, the better.

Galadriel took Wood while he was playing for another reason, too. He could have his broomstick and wand so he could fly around the tree. Galadriel and Oliver Wood got married. We will meet up with Wood and Galadriel in the later chapters.


	3. Legolas's Story

Disclaimer: Same as before. Don't own anything. Never have, never will.

Chapter 3-Legolas's Story

Legolas needed to kill his father, Thranduil. The problem was how. Many people had made death threats and he was well protected. The answer to his problem arrived in the last chapter. He would get Oliver Wood to do it. He was a wizard and he had his magic wand. There had to be some kind of spell to kill someone.

Legolas asked Oliver Wood to kill him with a curse, but Wood wouldn't. He said it was some kind of Unforgivable Curse. He asked Wood to teach him how to do the spell. Wood said O.K., because it wasn't him doing the curse. He told Legolas what to do and he gave him his wand.

Legolas approached his dad when he was sleeping. He said the words that Wood had told him to say. "Avada Kedavra" he said quietly. Legolas was satisfied. 

Again, the world was shocked over yet another king's death. No one could pin it on Legolas since there was nothing on his body. People said it just looked like he was sleeping.

Legolas and Arwen finally get married. Legolas becomes King of Mirkwood. Arwen names Eowyn and Faramir Lord and Lady of Gondor, since they deserve a royal title. 


	4. Oliver's Story

Disclaimer: I still don't own anything, if you sue you will get my copy of lotr. It's very worn and it's only half mine, my sister owns the other half, so you'll have to share it with her.

Chapter 4- Oliver Wood's Story

Oliver Wood got really bored. Galadriel would not let him rule. He was tired of flying around their tree. He had a great idea. He would start his own Quidditch team. Wood summoned a snitch, a quaffle and two bludgers from the Qudditch closet at Hogwarts. He also got 6 Firebolts from Quality Quidditch Supplies. Firebolts were still the in broom.

He would have seeker tryouts the next week. Wood wanted to use the Shire for the tryouts. Galadriel ordered the hobbits to move to Mordor for the week, since there was now no evil there. He lined all of the applicants up and explained what the seeker does. He then gave six people brooms and told them to fly after the gold ball. He decided to have four teams, The Hobbits (Hufflepuff), The Elves (Gryffindor), The Men (Ravenclaw), and The Dwarves (Slytherin). He would join The Hobbits, since they have a disadvantage of being short. 

The Hobbits: Seeker: Samwise Gamgee, Chasers: Rosie Cotton, Frodo Gardner (son of Sam), Farmir1 (son of Pippin), Beaters: Meriadoc Brandybunk, Peregrin Took, Keeper: Oliver Wood.

The Elves: Seeker: Legolas Greenleaf, Chasers: Arwen, Elrohir, Galadriel, Beaters: Elladan, Haldir, Keeper: Glorfindel

The Men: Seeker: Eowyn, Chasers: Faramir, Nilturiel (do you like me cameo?), Christina, Beaters: Eomer, Eorl, Keeper: Laura

The Dwarves: Seeker: Glim Oakenfoot, Chasers: Gloin, Dori, Durin, Beaters: Ori, Kili, Keeper: Fili 


End file.
